Friday, February 26, 2016

In which the pond salutes our very own Bunterish Colonel Blimp down under ...

(Above: and you may Greg Hunt the notion of 'travesti' here, but be careful of walri straying up from the south).

The pond has become seriously alarmed in recent times.

What if all the recent talk led to men and boy actors imagining they could play women and girls? Or even more shockingly, the notion that women might don pants and play men? Or boys ...

Why the very fabric of the world might crumble.

The pond was shocked and startled at the news that only a few blocks away from where it lives, the perverts were having their way with innocent young folk at a school in Newtown, as you may read at the ABC, as it gives space to the ACL here...

Imagine: a man playing Lady Macbeth, or even more incomprehensible, a man playing Portia. What's that you say? Women playing Hamlet?

How would it be if the daughters in Lear were to be played by men? What to make of the Queen and Ophelia being played by men? Fancy the comedies being filled by gaily clad men going about the business of cross-gender jokes ...

Haven’t we had enough of this gender confusion and chaos? What would happen if a young boy was called upon to play Juliet? Why to be true to character the poor lad would have to be somewhere between 12 and 14, and this would be little short of grooming. A career in the Catholic church might be the lad's only future ...

The very notion of Empire would shake and quake. Shakspere would roll in his grave ...

What's that you say? This role-playing didn't get Bill and the first Queen Liz agitated?

Oh alright, the pond has its tongue stuffed firmly up the codpiece of the hysterics, and is there a greater cod in more urgent need of a stuffing than George Christensen?

So shameless and desperate is the man in his attention-seeking of late that the pond has been inclined to ignore him, in the manner of its shunning of Paul 'the magic water man' Sheehan …

But you can't keep a good man down, or a fuckwit bobbing to the surface, even if that reminds the pond of a recent Colbert image...



The turtle has gone, but not our George ... not yet anyway ...


Sounds like a desperate fuckwit desperate for attention, you might say, but the pond admires the exemplary use of the notion of "graphic critique", even while wondering if George might have the first clue what "critique" means, let alone "graphic" ...

It sounds a little French, and we know what they mean by French kissing ...

Trust AAP? Maestro, a pulsating beat on the British Paints can, along with a "sure can!" for emphasis:


But here's the thing. So long as Moorice keeps hitting the mark, gorgeous George hasn't got a snowball's chance in hell of returning to his place in the pond banner ...

Sure he's a clown full of astonishing bigotry and stupidity, sure he flings around 'North Korea' in a way born to the Joe McCarthy style ...

Is there an Orwellian in the house? We need an Orwellian in the house ...

But his attention-seeking is pathetic ...

George has returned to twittering with an epic flourish of bigotry and homophobia, smiting mightily anyone in his path ...



Sex toys!

Gay bars!

Sexual fetishes!

And so on and tediously on. Turns it the lad's a bloated troll, trolling while claiming to troll the trolls ...

And a correspondent kindly provided a link to this little effort, which can be found in its original form here ...


Surely there's identify theft involved with that one.

Could a man be so stupid?

So much with the hate. It reminded the pond of this recent effort by the reptiles, letting a piece in The Times out from behind its paywall ...



Indeed, indeed. Now what would have happened if the story had featured a couple of funny looking Jews with funny looking hats and funny looking hair curls, with the header "Western progressives are colluding in cruelty and abuse," as it launched a scathing attack on male genital mutilation ...

It would have created a great opening line for google ... Male genital mutilation is barbaric ...



How about a couple of heavily garbed nuns in the bizarre traditional manner? With the header "Western reptiles are colluding in the cruel notion that virgins get a short cut to heaven ..."?

That Times' piece ended with a clarion call ...

The West is not culturally perfect. Women are still often denied equal pay and suffer domestic violence. But there is a sense that this is wrong. If the West is to keep improving rather than regress to a darker age, everyone needs to stand up for our liberal heritage.

Uh huh, so why are you scribbling a piece for the chairman,  Ms Thomson, as illiberal a man at the head of an illiberal corporation as is doing the rounds?

You see, you can't pick and choose. You can't be on the side of liberalism, and then pick and chose the form of genital mutilation of which you disapprove.

And you can't be on the side of liberalism and let Cory Bernardi do his thing,  or allow a fuckwit like gorgeous George out of his homophobic, gay and Islamic bashing cage at regular intervals ...

You can't have the cheap and easy shots of the faux patriots, strutting like overweight peacocks, flag-waving in the first refuge of the scoundrel way ... or else you end up with this sort of hate and fear mongering muck ...


Let's not get too Freudian about it, let's just note that there's something deeply unhappy and angry going on in this man, as deep and as angry as the stupidity and anger which Daesh and the rest of the fundamentalist followers of fundamentalist religion daily offer the world ...



Well the pond generally supports rampant secularism on all fronts, but we can occasionally drift back to our Tamworth days, and remember how to honour the long absent Hughie, and serve the Queenly imperialists like a lick spittle colonial lackey, and salute the flag like some dullard dead-witted monarchist, and get on board with that sort of Bunterish, Colonel Blimp crap...

So we honour and salute gorgeous George in our Cobert way ...



Now on with the flushing ...





9 comments:

  1. Shouldn't George be at war with obesity?

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    1. Good lard no, he's a tolerant man with liberal Western values..

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  2. And supporting his local sugar industry

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    1. I believe he separates out the grains that are halal certified

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  3. Obviously copious cholesterol deposits have blocked blood flow to the brain.

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  4. To ask a blindingly stupid question - just what does Georgie think that his fun-filled hate site will actually accomplish? Sure, it might further cement him a place as a darling of the barking mad Hard Right, raise his profile within the Nats, and thus eventually land him a Ministerial gig, but apart from that…. Sorry, I think I may have answered my own question.

    BTW, while George certainly has certain Bunteresque air to him, surely it’s too early for him to displace Piers as Australia’s own Fat Owl of the Remove? From memory however Billy Bunter had a younger brother, Samuel Bunter. Perhaps Georgie Porgy could be known as Young Sammy Butler until such a time as he can legitimately overtake Piers in the fuckwit stakes?

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    1. Far too early Anon. You have to serve years in the tuckshop of life before you get free access to all the treats. But your suggestion of Sammy Bunter (named in honour of Bunter's father, Mr Samuel Bunter) is perfect casting, truly in the spirit of loonacy that infests this pond, and though senility might well overcome the pond, henceforth gorgeous George should be known as Young (or if you will Little) Sammy Butler ...

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  5. Sorry, that should have been "Young Sammy Bunter", not Butler. I think that the author of "Erewhon" would have felt rather peeved at being confused with Georgie.

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    1. Oh, the pond couldn't resist continuing the jape, because naming gorgeous George after Samuel Butler is also too rich in a post-modernist, post-ironic way ...

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Samuel_Butler_(novelist)

      And so you scored two pond laughs, not just one ...! Good cheer all round.

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