Saturday, June 17, 2017

in which the pond roams from the dog botherer to the oscillating fan ...


The pond humbly offers this poster as a suggestion and an inspiration.

Frankly the graphic accompanying the Dupont column this day in the lizard Oz was a tad under-done ...


The pond understood what the reptiles wanted to do, but the colours were wrong.

Green? Wrong. Red is the colour of menace! And that soldier seemed positively mild ...

Now there are many other inspirations, which could turn into humble pond suggestions ...

 

... but the pond has other fish to fry this day, because the dog botherer was out and about, moaning and wailing, and it was simply too delicious to resist ...


When sensible discussion is overwhelmed by shouting ...

It seems to imply that the reptiles are sensible, and sensibly involved in sensible discussions, and never resort to shouting ...and that reform will somehow see an end to the shouting, and the beginning of the sensible discussions we see on Sky every day of the week... well those keen to waste their money do ...

Never mind, the pond had a bet with the partner that the bilious dog botherer would lead off with some bile about Waleed Aly and Paul Bongiorno ... his idea of being non-shouty amounting to the notion that rats are best when sinking their vicious teeth into the ankle of alien life-forms of a lefty or Muslim kind ...


Every time the pond reads a reptile on new media, and the digital age, it realises yet again that they really are that fucking dumb ...

Almost immediately the pond had an insane desire to run a special shouty meme of the kind designed to send Murdochians into a frenzy of fear and loathing ...


Ah, that feels better and the pond can turn back to the grieving dog botherer in good cheer ...

It takes the special skill of a minor war criminal, who facilitated war crimes in Iraq, to explain how his columns are full of widely accepted but inconvenient facts, and how he is open to alternative points of view (except, it goes without saying, if offered by Waleed Aly, Paul Bongiorno, and their filthy, devious, degenerate kind ....)


If ever anyone wanted a classic example of the fearful paranoid mind at work, could they wish for better than this? Not to mention delusions of the kind which suggests the dog botherer in particular or the reptiles in general are into "consensus building."

All put on display in such a monstrous vacuum of self-unawareness about the deeds and doings for which the delusional paranoid works that the pond was boggled ... which is how the pond gets its jollies, being boggled by the reptiles...


Here, but how remarkable that "fair and balanced" was mocked ... if only someone would mock the futterings of the futtock dog botherer and thereby restore him to the real world ...


The pond has money on the Murdochians helping drive the Ten network into the ground, rejig the deals with American suppliers, and generally get a nice bargain basement deal, and then, after picking it up cheap, persuade the regulators to devise new regulations to keep it propped up...

Given the way the Murdochians in the past have routinely socialised their losses and privatised their gains, it seems a fair bet ...

Meanwhile, it will be the business of the reptiles to bleat about how hard done-by they are, and how it's all the fault of deviant digerati, and how everything must be returned to them, because that's the business of government ... looking after special interests in a position to bleat loudly about their suffering ...

Around this point the pond felt the need for a breather ... and what better way than to drop in on the Oz editorialist ...


They're not still banging on about Malware cracking a few jokes?


What's astonishing is the way the reptiles keep on wanting everyone to step around the narcissist, as might be done with the mad uncle when he ventures out of the attic ... as if somehow it's possible to have respectful relations with a country being run by a loon who keeps dribbling into his twitter ...


The dog botherer talks of the damnable digerati, while the Donald blathers on about the fake news media? But who helped him get into power?  Could it have been the fair and balanced network?

Around this time, the pond realised it was still peckish, still more-ish, and decided on a rare plunge into the world of the disgruntled, unhappy oscillating fan ...

It was compelling that the general moan in the Oz splash ...


... somehow turned into a specific moan and a whine about mediscare and renewables  in the google listing...



Sure enough, the oscillating fan started with comrade Bill, before moving on to the Liberals and then flinging his arms into the sky, and shouting out the window as if he was in rehearsal for a Peter Finch-style performance ...


Strange that the oscillating fan should focus on Comrade Bill, when there were rich pickings in the air ...



Ah, the onion muncher, always the first to introduce civility, reason, good humour and politeness into any political discussion ...


There was a punch line of sorts:

The size of Abbott's cheer squad has gradually whittled away since last year's federal election as his colleagues have grown increasingly exasperated by his thuggish destructiveness, and even some of his ardent media backers have found it hard to wait for the return of their Chosen One. 
He is on the nose in his party. Many of his colleagues wish he would just go away. There are serious mutterings about a possible preselection challenge, particularly since he was believed to be at serious risk of losing his seat at last year's election and was only saved by interventions from the Prime Minister and the then NSW premier Mike Baird. (hint, for more, follow the Tingle twitter feed).

Naturally the pond turned back to the oscillating fan, sure he'd be on top of the situation:



Indeed, indeed ...but how kind the oscillating fan is to the onion muncher's nattering negativity ...

And then what do you know, the oscillating fan went full Peter Finch and offered up tales of politicians suffering hugely, bigly, mightily, and getting righteously mad as hell...



How pathetic. 

The base salary from July 2013 clicked in at $195,130 (here), and that's the base, without talking of the fringe benefits and the superannuation scheme.

From 2015 in NSW, the highest salary scale classification for teachers who chose to stay in the classroom stumbled at $92,892. (here). To do better involves becoming a subject master or leaving the classroom altogether ...

This cultivated sense of grievance at the lot of politicians is perhaps even more insulting than the sense of grievance cultivated by the dog botherer about his media chums ...

Don't start whining to the pond about the injustice and unfairness of it all, when the reptile editorialist takes easy shots at Malware for daring to tell a few jokes about a narcissist loony ... 

Don't start telling the pond how politicians would make a go of it in the private sector. The onion muncher's still there because he's unemployable in any sector interested in making money (and while you're at it, why not hire Petie boy for a double downer).

Don't get into a moan and a bitch about how hard it is down at four o'clock in morning at coal mine, or the pond will want to go all Pythonish.

If anyone can't handle the heat, they can leave the kitchen. Otherwise they should just enjoy the fun of the fair and the witch hunts ...



5 comments:

  1. As I've said many a time, imagine opening your eyes of a morning, looking in the mirror and discovering you are Chris Kenny. What a trip!

    Of late I have developed a sympathy for actual journalists who by fate are consigned to being published in the same space as Kenny. Not a good trip at all.

    But here, in Michael Gordon's piece for Fairfax today on the relentless attacks on Gillian Triggs, the harangued one herself make a very good point about Kenny, one that has been referred to in the pond ad infinitum. over to you ex-Commissioner:

    'Triggs is unbowed. Of Kenny, perhaps the most vociferous of her many critics at The Australian, she says: "He keeps swirling the same facts over and over again and they are not true for a start – and that's all he's got. I've never met him. He's never phoned me or made any attempt to understand anything. It's just been a full-on attack."

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  2. I went to the newsagent shop this morning and purchased a copy of the Week End West Australian newspaper. I noticed ther was 1 copy of Murdoch Australian and about 100 of the local paper. Thats all the murdoch rag is worth.

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  3. Kenny, the sensible dog botherer.......licking Rupert's testicles again!
    He is a shameless mutt......but will never gain access to the thoroughbred testicle licking club. Just another sensible useful idiot.

    https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/jun/16/donald-trump-rupert-murdoch-friendship-fox-news

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  4. The Lizards of Oz

    We are the very models of the nation’s hacks and quibblers
    And we lick the arse of business – Yes! we are the News Corp scribblers
    Although our facts are flakey and our thinking’s problematical
    We’ll print our crap regardless cos this world is so dramatical
    What with lefties, greens and communists all out to Balkanise us
    And those unAustralian Muslims, who might secretly be Isis
    Yes we all kowtow to Donald though his tweetings are vexatious
    And Rupert too - although his posts are stupid and fallacious
    But as we’re so far up ourselves - and our skins are so crustaceous
    We’ll never know just why it is that everybody hates us


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    Replies
    1. Beaudy, Kez :-) (and I hope you've still got enough time on your hands for plenty more.)

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