Friday, June 02, 2017

In which the pond treasures Sharri and wants what James drinks ...



The pond has to hand it to the Terrorists. 

There's the world in uproar about the Donald, and there's Erica jumping on the bandwagon - what is this climate science nonsense? asks brain-dribbling Erica and Malcolm - and yet this morning the Terrorists had Sharri roasting a favourite old chestnut on the flames of irrelevance ...

But the pond is loyal, even if it involves immense self-sacrifice, even if it means the giving up of titillating stories of the bromancing Chicken Little kind ...



The pond loves it when the bromancer gets into a dither of a tither, gets out the zither and strums tunes of wild-eyed despair ...

But Sharri has that marshmallow getting charcoal carbon black, so away the pond went, deep into the valley of peripheral extraneousness ...

Oh perhaps the pond should have adopted the Sharri header style: Irrelevance and Futility in Waiting?




Telling!

Though the tell tells that Sharri has very little to tell in her telling, and so to fill in the space, the reptiles resorted to four rather large snaps, here compressed, because WTF ...



But if that's the game, the pond has its own set of snaps ...



Turning back to Sharri, there's no question that this is a prime chance to re-hash everything that's been hashed these past few months ... with bonus cartoon ...



The pond has over its years of reptile observation had a few regrets, more regrets than it has time to mention, but the regrets went in to hyperdrive when Sharri dusted off the corpse of the onion muncher and once again paraded it in full view of the Terrorist readership, the onion muncher being the new favourite featured writer for the reptiles ...



And there it was ... a guaranteed way to repeat Labor's chaos and sign the death knell of the coalition, though how you might actually sign a death knell remained a tad obscure ...


Of course. How silly and remiss of the pond. Sign the death knell by carving a note with an arrow-head ...

Bring back the onion muncher, bring him back now.

Telling went the belling!

And for this noble insight, the pond thinks it's time that decent awards for proper journalism should be brought back ... with Sharri worthy of a nomination in her special category ...


But for some reason, the ungrateful pond wasn't fully satisfied, and besides had been distracted and tempted by this splash in the lizard Oz ...



Say what? The constitution gives First Nations a say? 

Was he talking about the right to vote? Possibly ... after all, 3% of the population is likely to score a huge number of seats in both federal houses if they voted in a bloc (head off to Creative Spirits here for the total voting tally).

But that explanation didn't quite satisfy the pond. While it understood that Jimbo was a futtering futtock of the first water, he couldn't have meant that, could he, when talking about the constitution giving difficult blacks a say?

What did the google reveal?



Lordy, lordy, Jimbo was sticking to his story, so the pond had to read on, and learn exactly how the constitution already gave Aboriginal people a say, and not just by voting ...




Now around this point, the pond had to pause. 

There was a mention of the dangers of having a black voice enshrined in the Constitution. But damned if the pond could see how the current constitution already gives Aboriginal people a say, apart from the right to be voted down every which way by the majority of voters, which is to say the other 97% of the population, assuming that Jimbo thinks everyone should vote according to tribal allegiance ...

Would the mystery be solved in the final Jimbo jumbo gobbet?



Nope. There's a mention of anachronistic references to race in the Constitution, and there's a suggestion that the government might already be able to establish better consultation processes without resorting to constitutional change ... in the way that Australian governments have managed so admirably over the years ...

And after a horse laugh about that line, the pond realised what that header represented.

It was a classic bit of trolling bullshit click bait ...and switch once they got the pond in with that all day sucker headline ...meaningless crap of the standard reptile Oz kind ...

Jumbo and the reptiles deserved an award which might help their flailing, failing business model ...


And now, because the Donald is inescapable, and the pond already has a huge backlog of cartoons, it's time for papal advice, with more of the real Pope available here ...



Good old Groucho ...his wise words could apply to Jimbo as much as to the Donald ...




Oh yes, and let's spare a thought for Sharri desperate to bring the onion muncher back ...





2 comments:

  1. Hmmm. Silly me, I thought we were trying to implement some kind of retrospective justice for Aboriginals not because of their "race" (whatever the hell a "race" is) but because of their history - ie their history of imposed repression and exploitation at he hands of the colonialists.

    But what does the Australian Cinstitution really say ? I think it's a lot like the Bible: nobody ever reads it except the few 'initiates' who have to.

    And anyway, it doesn't matter what the constitution says, what matters is what a High Court judge decides that it says. "Impled democratic rights" anybody ?
    [ http://lawgovpol.com/implied-rights-constitution/ ]

    ReplyDelete
  2. Deep into the valley of peripheral extraneousness.... Love it. :)
    I sense Sharri has been receiving mentoring from the the Major...or is it just a case of a vain 'does my brain look too big in this article?' troll?

    ReplyDelete

Comments older than two days are moderated and there will be a delay in publishing them.